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Mean insults

Mean insultsMean insults is something you should be careful with. They can really hurts another person. Use them only when necessary and others are cruel to you. Here you get insults that really works and hit where they should be. Read them and see if you can find your favorite.

  • Don’t you love nature, despite what it did to you?
  • You should donate blood. All of it!
  • Your family tree is a cactus, because everybody on it is a prick.
  • If I wanted a friend like you, I’d buy a dog.
  • You must have been born on a highway because that’s where most accidents happen.
  • I can’t tell if you’re on too many drugs or not enough.
  • It looks like your face caught on fire and someone tried to put it out with a fork.



  • Twinkle twinkle little star,
    I want to hit you with my car,
    Throw you off a cliff so high,
    I hope you break your neck and die.
  • Two wrongs don’t make a right, take your parents as an example.
  • I failed a spelling test because they asked me how to spell ‘bitch’ and I wrote down your name.
  • You must have been born on a highway, because that’s where most accidents happen.
  • I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the garbage.
  • Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth?
  • You’re not my cup of tea, mainly because I don’t like huge pieces of shit in my tea.
  • We all sprang from apes, but you didn’t spring far enough.
  • Some people are like slinkies; they’re really good for nothing, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.
  • Great selection of Mean insults

  • The only way you’ll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chicken’s ass and wait.
  • I’m not saying I hate you, but if you ever got hit by a bus, I’d probably be the one driving it.
  • If you were twice as smart, you’d still be stupid.
  • I’m not saying I hate you, but if you were on fire, I’d sit down and pull out the marshmallows.
  • It’s better to let someone think you are an Idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.
  • Nothing happens after you die? False. Some of us will be throwing a party.
  • You’re so ugly Hello Kitty said goodbye to you.
  • I don’t hate you, but I wish your dad used a condom.
  • I wasn’t born with enough middle fingers to let you know how I feel about you.
  • I’m not saying that I hate you, it’s just when your mouth opens, I get an overwhelming urge wanting to rearrange your face with a shovel.
  • You are so ugly that when your mama dropped you off at school she got a fine for littering.
  • I’d slap you, but I don’t want slut on my hands.
  • If I had a face like yours, I’d sue my parents.
  • You need to go brush your teeth cause all you seem to do is talk shit!
  • Out of 100,000 sperm, you were the fastest?
  • Light travels faster than sound, this is why some people appear bright before they speak.
  • Keep talking, someday you’ll say something intelligent!
  • I’m the type of person to laugh at mistakes so sorry if I laugh at your face.
  • Do you have to leave so soon? I was just about to poison the tea.
  • Sometimes, I REALLY want to slap you, but that’s animal abuse.
  • You do realize makeup isn’t going to fix your stupidity?
  • You’re so pathetic, your imaginary friend hates you.
  • You’re a failed abortion whose birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory.
  • Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, God made me pretty, What the hell happened to you?
  • I love what you’ve done with your hair. How do you get it to come out of the nostrils like that?



  • I’d slap you, but shit stains.
  • You only annoy me when you’re breathing.
  • I don’t exactly hate you, but if you were on fire and I had water, I’d drink it.
  • I’m jealous of all the people that haven’t met you!
  • More of Mean insults

  • I’d like to kick you in the teeth, but why should I improve your looks?
  • The only way I’d lay naked with you would be in a mass grave.
  • Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, the 3rd ones for you.
  • I would ask how old you are, but I know you can’t count that high.
  • People like you are the reason they made the morning after pill.
  • You are proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.
  • My middle finger gets a boner when I think of you.
  • If you really want to know about mistakes, you should ask your parents.
  • You are proof that God has a sense of humor.
  • I don’t think you are stupid. You just have a bad luck when thinking.
  • You’re the best at all you do – and all you do is make people hate you.
  • Shut up, you’ll never be the man your mother is.
  • Why don’t you slip into something more comfortable… like a coma.
  • I don’t know what makes you so stupid, but it really works.
  • Lets play house. You be the door and I’ll slam you.
  • Are you always an idiot or just when I’m around?
  • When you get run over by a car, it shouldn’t be listed under accidents.
  • You look like a before picture.
  • We can always tell when you are lying. Your lips move.
  • You’re like STDs, nobody wants you, everyone hates you and it proves your parents should have used protection.
  • You must have a low opinion of people if you think they’re your equals.
  • You’re like school in the summertime – no class.

Now that you’ve read them all, I hope you enjoyed them and could use one or more of them. Use them only as a last resort. Remember that bullying starts with an insult that just grows day by day. Better to use them on your friends that know you only consider them funny. If you have one or more mean insults you think fits this list, simply submit them, it would be a great help to me.

Other categories of insults