Great insults

• • You fail, so did your dads condom.

• • You grow on people….so does cancer.

• • I have way more important things to do than thinking about what you have to say to me.

• • Is that your face? Or did your neck just throw up?

• • If you want a good comeback you should go lick your mums face.

• • I would insult you back but Mother Natures has already done such a fine job, I just couldn’t compete.

• • You’re so stupid that you had to call 411 to get the number for 911.

• • I’m a lot better than what you have to look at in the mirror every morning.

• • You must have been born on a highway because that’s where most accidents happen.

• • I thought I said goodbye to you this morning when I flushed the toilet.

• • If I were a dog and you were a flower I’d lift up my leg and give you a shower.

• • Funny you should call me an ugly bitch, your daddy likes to call me princess and other beautiful names, while he is dry humping my leg.

• • Is that perfume or marinade?

• • So, a thought crossed your mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey.

More of the Great insults

• • Shut up, I’m not your mirror.

• • How did you get here? Did someone leave your cage open?

• • You’re spreading rumors about me? At least you found a hobby spreading something other than your legs.

• • I’d slap you, but that would be animal abuse.

• • Zombies are looking for brains. Don’t worry. You’re safe.

• • Better at sex than anyone? Now all you need is a partner.

• • Don’t get your panties in a bunch!

• • Acting like a dick won’t make yours any bigger.

• • Dont let your mind wander, it’s far too small to be out by itself.

• • Your ugly – and your living proof that abortion should be legal.

• • Learn from your parents mistakes, use birth control.

• • Do they make those pants in men’s sizes?

• • Keep rolling your eyes. Who knows, maybe you’ll find a brain back there.

• • I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and shit out a smarter statement than that.

• • Why do you even wear a bra? You have nothing to put it in.

• • It’s scary to think that people like you are allowed to vote.

• • Out of millions of sperm, you were the fastest?

• • I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.

• • I like you, you remind me of how it feels after I drop a huge deuce in the toilet.

• • The smartest thing that ever came out your mouth was a penis.

• • If I throw a stick, will you leave?

• • You’d better hide, the garbage collecter is coming.

• • I know I’m talking like an idiot. I have to, other wise you wouldn’t understand me.

• • So you’ve changed your mind? Does this one work any better?

• • Shouldn’t you be out on a ledge somewhere?

• • Do you have to leave so soon? I was about to poison the tea.

• • You’re not stupid, your just possessed by a retarded ghost.

The last 15 of the Great insults

• • Why don’t you go play in traffic?

• • I’m fat because every time I did your mom she gave me a cookie.

• • Shut up, you’ll never be the man your mother is!

• • Some babies were dropped on their heads but clearly you were thrown at the wall.

• • Nice outfit. Go stand on a street corner, you could make some money.

• • If you’re going to act like a turd, go lie in the yard.

• • Has anybody ever told you that you are incredibly average?

• • I wish I had a lower I.Q, maybe then I could enjoy your company.

• • This is why people talk about you when you’re not around.

• • I don’t have the time or energy to sink to your level; you have a nice day though.

• • I’m busy now, can I ignore you another time?

• • I would answer you back but life is too short, just like your d*ck.

• • I may be fat but you’re ugly and at least I can loose weight.

• • You have a remarkable grasp of the obvious.

• • I dont care what everybody says about you, i think your good guy.