Obama jokes some are funny, some are weird and others are just silly. Every president is trying his best to make decisions that will benefit the country. Some do it better than others, and it is no different with Obama. Every president makes mistakes; some love them for it while others don’t. There is no wrong or right here. I hope you like these jokes about Obama. Maybe we will make jokes about all future presidents.
- Whats Michelle Obamas favorite vegetable?
- What does Barack Obama call illegal aliens?
- A man died and went to heaven. He saw St. Paul in front of him. Behind him was a wall of clocks. The man asked St. Paul “What are these clocks for?” St.Paul answered “These are lie clocks, every time you lie the clock moves once.” There’s Mother Teresa’s. She hadn’t lied once so her clock is still. There’s Abraham Lincoln’s clock. He had lied just once and the clock has just moved once. The man asked “Where is Obama’s clock?” St.Paul said “Oh! It’s in Jesus’s office he uses it as a ceiling fan.”
- Obama: Look, when I was a kid, I inhaled frequently. That was the point.
- Barack Obama and Joe Biden are on a plane. Suddenly Joe Biden says I can throw 100 dollars out of this plane and make 100 people happy. Barack says I can throw 1000 dollars out of the plane and make 1000 people happy. The pilot over heard this and said, “I can throw both of you out of this plane and make the whole country happy.”
- Why shouldn’t Democrats worry about losing the midterm elections?
Apparently depression is covered by Obamacare.
- Barack Obama is on a sinking ship, who gets saved?
- U.S Presidents and Statesmen are on every piece Of U.S. currency.
So Will Barack Obama Be Placed On The FoodStamp Card?
- Why won’t Barack Obama be celebrating his birthday?
Republicans won’t let Democrats raise taxes on the rich let alone Barack Obama’s age!
- What is Barack Obama telling Independents?
Orange Is NOT The New Black.
- What kind of lip balm do presidents use?
- What is Barack Obamas favorite TV show?
Game of Drones.
- Why did Obama change his name from Barry to Barack?
He thought Barry sounded too American.
- How did Barack Obama propose to Michelle Robinson?
He got down on one knee and said “I don’t want to be Obama self.
- Other than health care, what other promises has Barack Obama made to the American People? Balancing the budget, reining in the banks and putting a unicorn in every backyard!
- What’s the main difference between Romneycare and Obamacare?
- Why did Barack Obama save the auto industry?
Because his shareholders are the American people!
- How do you know your doctor is not a fan of Obama’s Health Care Plan?
He/she has remodeled the waiting room with death paneling.
- Why won’t Obama release his real birth certificate?
He accidently smoked it.
- Did you hear about the reporter who asked Obama a hard question?
Neither have I!
- What’s more unacceptable than another 4 years of Obamacare?
Another 8 years of Romneycare!
- Why can’t Obama dance?
Cause he has two leftist feet.
- What do you call a Nebraskan who hates Obama?
- How is Barack Obama going to get Republicans to cross party lines and support health care reform? By giving their mistresses free breast implants!
- How is Obama going to make the tobacco industry pay for health care reform?
By allowing Marlboro Miles to be redeemed for health care coverage!
- Why has America gotten past our racist past?
Because we picked a black man to clean up our mess!
- Why is it pointless for Barack Obama to hold Senior Citizens Q & A sessions on the internet? Because microwave ovens don’t have internet connections!
- Will health care be different under Barack Obama’s new reforms?
No, but if you call right now, you might get an appointment by then!
- Why is Healthcare reform so important to the enigmatic Barack Obama?
His pregnant mom was turned away from many hospitals and was forced to give birth in a manger!
- Republicans: “Obama would not have won without blacks, Hispanics, gays or Jews.”
Democrats: “Or as we like to call them: Americans”.
- Under Obama’s health care plan, can you get coverage for preexisting conditions?
Certainly, as long as they don’t require any treatment!
- What’s Obama’s new slogan in these tough times?
Spare Change You Can Believe In!
- Why did Barack Obama cross the road?
To help the other side!
- Why is it surprising that Dick Cheney and Barack Obama are related?
Because Dick Cheney now has more blacks and gays in his own family than in the entire Republican Party!
- Why shouldn’t Sarah Palin look into Barack Obama’s campaign contributions after learning “Obama may have received $3.3 million from abroad?”
It turns out that broad is Oprah Winfrey!
- Why is it not surprising that Republicans lost two presidential races to Obama?
In long races usually the guy from Kenya wins.
- Did you hear that Barack Obama and Kanye West are related?
Apparently, they both think they are the son of god.
- Which person did President Obama thank first for helping him win the 2008 election?
- What is the difference between Obama and Jesus?
Jesus can put a cabinet together.
- Did you know that McDonald’s is offering the Obama Happy Meal?
Order anything you want.
And the guy behind you has to pay for it.
- What’s the difference between Obama and God?
God doesn’t think he is Obama.
- Why should Obama have choosen Evan Bayh for Vice President?
The name Birch Evans Bayh III makes Barack Hussein Obama sound almost normal.
- How does Obama sleep?
First, he lies on one side, and then he lies on the other.
- How does President Obama plan to address the countries immigration problems?
By deporting Senator Ted Cruz.
- Did you hear about the new Obama Diet?
You let Putin eat your lunch every day.
- Why won’t Obama release his real birth certificate?
The ink isn’t dry yet.
- Why won’t Obama laugh at himself?
Because it would be racist.
- What do you get when you cross a crooked politician with a crooked lawyer?
- What did George W Bush say after hearing Barack Obama admitted to using cocaine in high school?
“High school? I can’t believe he waited that long.”
- What is Obama’s archenemy?
- Why did Barack Obama bulldoze the Rose Garden?
He didn’t want any Bushes at the White House.
- Why will Jay Leno vote for Barack Obama?
Because it’s too easy to make jokes at Mitt Romney’s expense.
- What does Obama do after a wet dream?
Get up and screw the country.
- What does OBAMA stand for?
One Big Ass Mistake America.
- Why does Obama always talk in circles?
He has two left shoes.
- If Barack Obama has a mandate to do anything, it’s to raise Mitt Romney’s taxes.
- 28% of Americans voted for President Obama just because they enjoy watching white people embarrass themselves after he wins.
- The pentagon has changed strategies in the war against ISIS. Instead of sending cruise missiles, they are sending Obamas Economic Advisors.
- Mitt Romney puts women in Binders. Obama puts Women on the “Supreme Court”.
- Richard Nixon put a man on the moon, Barack Obama put a man in the women’s room.
- If Obama controlled Halloween, would he take all the candy from the kids trick-or-treated and give it to the kids who didn’t trick-or-treat?
- Did you hear, Tony Romo’s cronic choking is covered by obama care.
- 93% of African Americans voted for Obama. Clearly people aren’t voting for the right reasons.
- It’s so cold this winter, Obama is keeping his hands in his own pockets!
- If you think, Allen West won but President Obama didn’t, ask someone to hold your wallet for you.
- I just made Romney noodles Obama self.
- In Colorado, marijuana got more votes than Obama.
Many more jokes about Obama
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