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Midget jokes

Midget jokesHere is a great list with funny midget jokes. They are a bit condescending against little people. If you don’t like them, we got many different joke categories you may enjoy more. Don’t use these to hurt anyone. They are just for fun and nothing else.

  • I met a couple of really short people today.
    They were really down-to-earth guys.
  • When do you kick a midget in the balls?
    When he is standing next to your miss saying her hair smells nice.
  • Why do midgets always laugh when playing soccer?
    The grass tickles their balls!


  • What do a midget and a dwarf have in common?
    Very little.
  • What did the midget say when I asked him for a dollar?
    “Sorry, I’m a little short”.
  • Why can’t midgets wear tampons?
    Because they keep stepping on the string!
  • There’s only one group in society that I look down on…
    Midgets.
  • What is the difference between a clever midget and a venereal disease?
    One is a cunning runt, and the other is a running cunt.
  • What do you call a midget with 3 legs?
    Horny.
  • I crashed into the back of a car at the lights today.
    A really short guy got out of it and said, “I’m not happy.”
    I said, “Well which one are you then?”
  • What do you call a psychic midget wanted by the police?
    A small medium at large.
  • What do you call a poor midget?
    Short changed.
  • I played a round of miniature golf with my really short friend yesterday.
    Or as he called it, golf.
  • What is the definition of “pissed off”?
    A midget with a yo-yo.
  • Why shouldn’t you hire a midget chef?
    The steaks are too high.
  • I bumped into an old midget friend of mine yesterday.
    Small world.
  • Funny midget jokes

  • What did one small person say to the other on a swing?
    I’ll push you in a midget!
  • What do you get if you cross a gay midget with Dracula?
    Cocksucker!
  • Two midgets walk into a mini-bar…
  • What do you get when you cross a midget with a computer?
    A short circuit.
  • What do you call a party with 100 midgets?
    A little get together.
  • It’s too bad things didn’t work out between my midget girlfriend and me.
    I was just nuts over her.
  • What do you call a gangster hobbit?
    YOLO SWAGGINS.
  • What do you call a Mexican midget?
    A paragraph cause he’s too short to be an essay.
  • My friend is really sensitive about his lack of height.
    It’s best not to tease him about though, or he’ll punch you in the knee.
  • What did the doctor say to the midget?
    You just have to be a little patient.
  • How do you piss of a midget?
    Give him a yo-yo.
  • You’re so small that when it rains you’re the last to know!
  • Why don’t midgets need a wall to play handball?
    They just use the curb!
  • Why did the man seek counseling after finger banging a midget?
    He never thought he’d stoop so low.
  • I crashed a midgets wedding recently. I didn’t like him.
    I just wanted to see if he vanished when he put the ring on.
  • What do you get when you cross a midget with a prostitute?
    A little fucker about so tall.
  • What bank do midgets use?
    The Piggy Bank!


  • Why are midgets called paragraphs in Mexico?
    Because they’re too short to be called essays.
  • Why are gay midgets so appealing?
    They can suck a dick standing up!
  • Why are most midgets good guys?
    Because they don’t look down on people.
  • Midget jokes aren’t half as funny as normal-people jokes.
  • What do midgets look forward to in life?
    Growing up!
  • The last 10 midget jokes

  • Why can’t Midgets rob a gas station?
    Because they can’t reach the counter.
  • What do you call a Chinese midget?
    Tai Nee.
  • What does a midget model do?
    Pose for trophies!
  • What does a zombie call a midget with a bike?
    A happy meal.
  • Did you hear about the midget that overdosed on Viagra?
    He’s a little stiff now!
  • What do you call a Chubby Midget?
    Low Fat.
  • Why don’t people ask midgets for favors?
    Because they have short term memories!
  • How do you offend a midget?
    Hand him a step stool before you start talking to him.
  • What did the midget say when he got angry?
    Sorry, I’ve got a short temper.
  • What did the man say to his midget waiter?
    No No No I said I wanted shrimp for dinner!
I know these joke are derogatory, but here is a funny video with midget jokes. Just a warning its not the best quality.

This videoe was uploaded by “PWiklund”

What did you think about these midget jokes? Please leave a comment down below. This list is a bit “short”, so if you know any great midget jokes you think would be a great fit for this list, please submit, either as a comment or the submit form you can find I the main menu. Have a great day.

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